Almost Lois (Chapter Twenty-Two)

It had been four a.m. on a Saturday morning when Lois found herself tossing on sweats. Something was up and she could feel it in her gut. She didn't even need to turn on the radio or TV news before leaving. There was just a crackling in the air. That feeling made her sprint the four blocks to The Planet, made her tiptoe past the sleeping guard, made her take the stairs two at a time.

When she stepped into the bullpen, she knew she'd been right. Perry was there alone, but the phones were ringing off the hook. He pointed at her wildly and she picked one up, nodding at him. His eyes were wide, but he was smiling.

"Daily Planet," she said into Doris' phone.

"I can't describe it!" a woman shrieked without preamble. "The guy flew!" Lois threw Perry a confused look, but he only smiled and gestured to a notepad he was already scribbling in.

"So it was a red cape?" he asked whoever he had on the line. He laughed. "Tights? Well, that's just something."

Lois furrowed her brow, but grabbed a pad and pen. "Could you be more specific, Miss? When you say flew..."

"It was like he had a rocket on his back. He just jumped up and was off like a shot."

"Really?" She turned to Perry again, tapping her head.

But he shook his head and smiled again. He covered the mouthpiece of his phone. "I thought it was a bunch of crazies, too. But I got reputable sources at the P.D." He was practically salivating.

Lois' eyes widened and she spoke into the phone again. "Can I get your name, Miss?" She sat down and put the pen to paper. "And could you start from the beginning, describing everything you saw with as much detail as you can?"

"Dolores Fisher... And... Well, I heard this speeding car and some screams and then this loud squeal. I looked out my window. I figured it was a bunch of teenage punks and I was right... Only there was this gorgeous guy in tights. And I mean this guy was gorgeous. And he's pulling these kids from a car. The boys seemed kind of wasted and the girls with them were crying. I had to rub my eyes for what was like an hour. But it really happened. He pulled the guys out like they weighed nothing, opened the door for the girls and just took the keys and actually pushed the car into a parking spot on the side of the road! Then he turns to the girls and hands them the keys, saying something... I was too far to hear. Then he just grabs the boys and, I'm not kidding, the guy jumped up and flew with them. They went right past me. One of them puked and and got some on my window sill. And, let me tell you, that was really hard to..."

She frantically wrote as phones trilled around her. They just wouldn't stop. When Lois hung up, she stopped and waited for Perry. "What is this?" she asked when he put his receiver down.

"The story of the century," he yelled over the ringing. "I only came in an hour ago to check on the weekend edition before they printed and the security guard's going nuts. He says these whack jobs keep calling him, going on about a flying man in tights. When it doesn't stop, I call the printers to halt and look up my good friend Chief Henderson and..." He gestured around at the ringing room. "Well, here we are. This is the..."

"What's with all the phones?" They both whirled to face Jimmy, strolling in with a half-eaten candy bar.

"What are you doing here?" Perry yelled over the noise.

Jimmy shrugged. "I always come around early Saturday mornings. My roommate always wakes me up with all his drinking buddies and I'd rather be here." He gestured outside where the guard was probably napping even with the noise. "Manny and I have an understanding."

The din was still deafening and Perry shouted over it. "Well, don't just stand there! Both of you! Get to the phones!"

It wasn't long before all three of them were hanging up again. Lois shook her head, trying to get the ringing out of her ears. Perry grabbed Jimmy's pad and his and tossed them in her lap. "Lane, get to typing. I want your best work and nothing less. Make some sense out of all of these quotes." He turned to Jimmy. "You go downstairs. Tell the printers to keep them warm and scrap the front page. The heat wave can wait. We've got something hotter." He rubbed his hands together and laughed. "We're going to be the first paper to get this out!"

*************************************

"IT'S A BIRD, IT'S A PLANE..."

While The Telegraph and The Dispatch went on about the garbage workers strike and the heat wave, The Daily Planet had a front page with a blue and red blur, quickly purchased from the one guy who had the brains to take out a camera. But they also had detailed witness accounts. The TV and radio outlets were probably kicking themselves. Early this morning, they'd reported it as a joke with the implication of gas leaks causing hallucinations.

"While all of the witnesses recount super-human strength and speed as well as unbelievable accounts of flight with no apparent device," Perry read, slapping Lois on the back. "They also recount a feeling of trust and security along with what seemed to be an almost boyscout-like politeness. So what could the S stand for? Super, apparently." He put the paper down and toasted her with his coffee coffee mug.

They sat at a booth in the crowded Met Stop with Jimmy. And all three looked with satisfaction at the sea of Daily Planets around them. "Great work, Lois," Jimmy said, his mouth full.

"What about you?" Lois said, pointing her fork at him. "You whipped those printers into shape."

He blushed. "It was nothing." He nodded at Perry. "The Chief here was the one who ripped them a new one when they wouldn't listen to me."

Perry chuckled. "We really did it. Great Caesar's ghost! This is the best day of my life!"

"Can't rest on our laurels yet," Lois pointed out, savoring her loaded waffle sundae. A day like this called for fattening food covered in fudge and whipped cream. At least this once. "We need a clearer picture and we need an interview."

Jimmy laughed. "How are we supposed to get an interview with a guy that could fly off at any second?"

She put down her fork and licked her lips. "You leave that to me."

************************

The ringing wouldn't stop and he put his pillow over his head, trying to tune out. It had been past seven when he finally fell asleep. He was just so tired... He huffed and turned over as it finally let up, only to be interrupted by blinding light.

"Clark." He grabbed, but someone held his pillow out of reach.

"Mom!"

"It's afternoon. You really need to get up now. I know you're tired, but these calls from Star City are driving me nuts... What?" He cracked an eye open as his mother listened to whoever was on the phone. "No, A.C. I will not tell him he's the sh... You just watch your mouth."

Clark groaned and sat up. He'd had the best dream. He'd been flying all over Metropolis and... He looked down. The suit. He was wearing it. He shook his head. It was all real.

His mother rolled her eyes and smiled, putting a hand over the mouthpiece. "Could you take this, Clark? They won't stop until you answer." She suddenly leaned down and kissed him on the forehead. "I've got The Daily Planet downstairs. I am so proud of you. I made you chocolate chip pancakes." She tossed the phone in his lap before nearly skipping out of his room.

Muffled shouts came from his lap and he picked the phone up. "Yeah?"

"Holy shit, Clark!" A.C. yelled. Clark toned his hearing down and shook his head. It was always tough in the morning.

"What? What's wrong?"

"It's on the TV, the radio, the net... Our girl actually got there first, though." A.C. laughed. "From Boyscout to Superman! Dude!"

"What are you talking about?"

"About the guy in the cape who... Hold up. Wait a sec. Bart wants to talk... Dude, calm down. Here's Bart..."

Loud laughter burst from the other end. "You... I..." He broke off in giggles.

"You okay, Bart?"

"Tights!" he burst out, before breaking off into laughter again.

It faded as Victor came on the line. "Yeah, Impulse has been going nuts," he said. "The guy's turning purple. Are you really wearing tights? They didn't have a clear picture."

"It's just because of the wind," he grumbled. "My mom made it."

"Mama Kent? Hold on. Hold on... Hey, Bart. His mom made it." Another loud fit of laughter in the background.

Clark sighed. "Everyone knows?"

"Well, when the news is reporting a flying man in a red cape, people kind of want to know."

Clark laid back and stared at the ceiling. "What are they saying?" He could see the talking heads on MSNBC now, arguing about the new threat to the planet. Whatever the people he'd helped thought, the world was probably wary of men that flew.

"Don't you know?"

"I was up all night, apparently getting seen by most of Metropolis. I just woke up."

Victor laughed. It was rare and it made Clark sit up. "Clark, you really did it. They're calling you Superman."

"Superman?" It wasn't Invader Clark? That was almost promising.

"Yeah. Lois said it in her article and it really caught on. CNN's got people interviewing in Metropolis. They love you."

He smiled. Superman.

"Hey, here's Ollie," Victor said quickly. "Can't we just put him on speaker?"

There was shuffling and some feedback before Oliver's voice came through, slightly tinny. "So no one heard from you in a month and you go and do this?" He heard laughter again. "Oh, shut it, Bart... Clark, whatever Bart thinks, I think this is great. I'm glad you're finally out and proud."

"Could you not say it like that?" Clark grumbled.

More laughter, but it was suddenly muffled. "Dude, I will suffocate you," A.C. growled. "Could you let us talk?"

"Okay!" Bart giggled again, then took a deep breath. "Okay. I'm cool."

"Well, that's a lie," Clark said, sitting up and unlacing his boots.

"Boyscout, I gotta see this outfit," Bart burst out, still giggling slightly. "Can you send me a shot? I need a screensaver."

"Can it already, Bart," Oliver sighed. "It's not really tights... is it?"

"It's... uh... not loose."

"Unbelievable," Oliver laughed.

"What does Linda think?"

"Oh, she's not here. We're at headquarters. She opted to stay home and nap. Or so she says. You know she's calling Lois."

"Lois called me Superman," he said, wonder in his voice as he kicked off the boots. "Oh, just hold on." He stood and pulled the cape over his head to the front and grasped the zipper in the back of the outfit, twisting to pull it. He only got the top halfway off before he remembered the belt. He undid it quickly and pulled the briefs down with it. He stared at them. Maybe it was okay they were on the outside. He glanced in the mirror. With just the blue... Well, he felt like a defrocked member of the Blue Man Group. They at least had a cup and that added just a little modesty to the getup. He peeled the whole outfit down his legs and leaned back, sighing. His body could breathe again.

"Hello?"

He looked to his left and remembered the phone. "Yeah. Hey."

"So... what are you gonna do?" Victor asked. "I mean, I didn't hear about any mask or helmet."

He stretched. "My mom thinks people trust a guy when they see his face."

"She must be right," Oliver said. "The only network that's not singing your praises is LNN."

"Well, that figures," Clark groaned. "It's the only company Luthor still has an interest in. Even wiped, the guy's gunning for me."

"It's not that bad. But Clark... what about you? What about your life?"

He sat up and shrugged at no one. "I... I just hope they don't look past the glasses."

Oliver sighed. "Well, we'll see. Listen, why don't you come over? I could at least get you some spares. After all, the big, blue boyscout is finally giving us all a good name."

He smiled. "Yeah. Okay. Why the hell not?"

He quickly put on some jeans and a t-shirt and went downstairs, allowing himself to float right down. The smell of pancakes and chocolate filled the house and he breathed it in.

His mom poured out some orange juice and turned to him with a grin. "I'm just bursting."

"Oh, you know. All in a night's..."

"Where's your costume?" she suddenly asked. "I should wash it before tonight."

He sat and stared ahead. "Yeah. Tonight." Most people would be indulging on their weekend. Not him. He'd probably spend most nights and weekends searching for crime. "It's upstairs," he said.

"You didn't tear it, did you? Because there is a zipper."

"No, Mom," he sighed. He spooned out a generous amount of whipped cream and started on his pancakes.

She sat across from him and stared. "My son." She giggled. "There was a quote from the chief of police, you know."

"Yeah?"

She picked up the paper. It was smeared and obviously well-read. "'Concerned citizens like this are rare'" she read. "'There have been people with extraordinary gifts before, but none that use them so selflessly for the common good. Fifteen crimes were stopped. Fifteen people could sleep soundly. Some may call it vigilante justice, but this man was in full cooperation with the police. The perps were brought directly to us and, though a little shaken from the flight,' Henderson said with a laugh. 'They were mostly unharmed, The city of Metropolis should embrace this hero.'" She sighed. "I bet that went a long way with the rest of the world."

He smiled into his plate. "Well, kinda."

"I couldn't be prouder. Now if only someone had got a picture. I bet you looked so regal."

He rolled his eyes. "I still think it's too tight."

She pointed at the paper. "Not according to the women. One woman said you were deliciously..."

"Mom!"

*************************************

"Linda, I'm dying. I feel like the only person in the city who hasn't seen Superman."

"Superman?" Linda snorted. "Is that really what you want to call him? I mean, he's not that..."

"Linda, the man can fly. He has super strength, super speed, and God only knows what else he could do." She twirled the phone cord in her hand and leaned against the fridge. "I can't wait to see him."

"Well, you... I think you're making a big deal out of nothing. He's just... some guy in a tight suit."

Lois giggled. "I think that's a big deal. That's almost the best part."

"Please... The guy's flying all over at night and acting like he's in charge. Typical. He just..."

"Why are you so down on him?"

Linda sighed. "I just don't want you getting too mixed up with that type."

Lois leaned her head against the fridge. What was Linda so tense about? She didn't seem to have a problem with her own city's resident hero. In fact... hadn't she been behind Lois' articles about him that... She shook her head. "Well, don't worry. I probably couldn't mix if I tried. It's not like he'll want to talk to a reporter. The only people he talked to for more than a second were the cops."

"Well, good. Just... Steer clear. The guy looks like trouble to me."

"Have you been watching LNN?"

"No, but... I just want you to watch out. These hero types can blind-side you if you..."

"Linda, I'll be fine. I bet I won't even see him."

"Okay, then. Good. Great."

When she finally hung up, Lois strolled into her room. She pulled open her closet. She'd watch out, all right. She'd watch the skies and wait for that flash of red and blue. And then... Then she'd make her move. On a note of brilliance, she pulled out her shortest skirt and rushed to the living room. She picked up the phone and dialed quickly.

"Hey, Jimmy... What are you doing at midnight?"

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Chapter Twenty-Three