Chapter 14
At some point in the night, she woke to find him sprawled half on top of her. She pushed at him and he grumbled and rolled off, the covers falling down.
She rolled onto her side.
That wasn't a bad view. Really, none of him was. And she could appreciate that tonight. That was one of the nice things about tonight. It was why she didn't want to fight. She didn't want to lose this feeling. This strange relaxation, this blithe acceptance of what had changed.
And there was a change. A shift. She couldn't put her finger on when. It had been coming on so gradually. But she had felt it before he left for Detroit. With that need she'd sensed in him. That need she felt so compelled to answer.
She'd answered it the other night in ways she'd never imagined when she'd placed her hand on his chest.
It wasn't just about saving Clark. That just made the choice easier to make. But it was a choice she would have made regardless. She had to save him. What did she have this power for if not for that? I hope you do better things, Lex, she'd thought at the time. I want you to prove me right...
The things that run through your mind in life-and-death situations should be remembered. She hadn't seen the way Clark had taken her for granted, disregarded her feelings... She'd seen the many ways and times he'd saved her. And she'd seen Lex. Not the one that made her life hell. But the one that made her moan, shiver, even laugh sometimes.
There was hope for this man.
He needed her. He needed someone who saw that part of him that was worth saving.
And maybe she needed him just a little.
Coming back from the brink of death, she could appreciate things she often couldn't. If she stopped to think of Lex and all he'd done to her and others... Well, it made to hard to appreciate the man. But, coming home from a war against death itself... she could see a man here, not an enemy.
This was the man she'd saved. Not Lex Luthor, the unreasonable boss that was dismantling her dream. Not Lex Luthor, part-time dabbler in extra-terrestrial technology. Just Lex.
Just this man who snored lightly in his sleep, something she hadn't known before tonight.
And she was just Chloe. Not a meteor freak, not an investigator, not even a reporter here. Just a woman.
They were just a man and a woman here, doing what a man and a woman were technically built to do. Eating, sleeping, reading great books... all those other things were incidental. Just to pass the time between this. Mating. It was just a bonus that it felt good and, in these modern times, didn't have to result in progeny.
She could appreciate the simplicity of the act. She could appreciate the man who made it so good.
She could look at every line of his body and see the sort of lithe strength in it. So different from her idea of an ideal body or, to be honest, Clark's body. Clark... Well, she'd spent too many hours thinking of his body, replaying the moments she'd seen parts of him in her mind. He was sort of bulky and strong. She'd thought that was the only kind of body she could get behind. But that was before Lex.
She didn't often allow herself to contemplate Lex's form, not even during sex. There was a sort of secret giddiness to seeing it now, knowing that the sheen of sweat still there was because of her. Because of them. She pushed the cover down and looked her fill. She'd once observed he had the body of a swimmer and he did, lean with muscles that sort of stretched rather than bulged. He had slim hips, but a slight dip to his waist that she just wanted to bite.
She repressed the urge and just ran her fingertip over it.
Might have been a ticklish spot as he grumbled and rolled over, presenting his back to her.
That was okay, too.
She ran hand down his spine, strangely delighted when he shivered in his sleep.
The things he'd said tonight... She'd always thought that she was the only one wondering why she couldn't stop. She'd thought it was just some sort of appetite for sex... very complicated sex... that led him back to her. She'd never thought that he was as conflicted as she was as to why this was hard to stop.
She suspected, for him, it was a bit tied up with Clark and all those things she could never say just as, for her, it was a bit tied up with his work and whatever new crimes against humanity he was justifying to himself now. A good deal of this was about getting close to answers for both of them. Getting close to the one that held all the things you wanted to know.
But she knew... She was positive that least some of it was just them. Just Lex and Chloe. Just bodies finding solace and life.
She lazily swirled her fingers over the back of his neck.
"Stop it."
She jolted when she heard his voice and her finger skittered on his neck. He shivered and she smiled and continued running her finger up and down. "Stop what?"
"That. Stop it."
"Fine." She moved her finger to the dip of his waist and swirled it around, jumping when he turned over, grasping her hand. "I'm sorry. Did that tickle?"
He stared at her hard. "I'm trying to decide."
"If it tickled?"
"No." His hand grasped her wrist, thumb moving over her pulse. "If I like this new you."
She pulled her wrist away. "This isn't a new me. It's just... a different side."
"A side that wears tiny dresses. So far so good." He pulled at the dress that was still bunched around her waist. She'd got out of the top and pulled up the bottom, but there it still was.
"Guess that was a little hurried," she said, looking down at herself. She pushed it down over her hips and kicked it off. "I was trying to be more... relaxed."
"Oh, you were relaxed. So relaxed you fell asleep on me." She turned to him and he ran a hand over her hip, then behind. "And I was the one who was almost dead. What's your excuse?"
She closed her eyes. "Guess I don't have one," she lied. "You could move that hand to the front, you know."
"I would." His hand stilled. "But I haven't forgotten."
Her eyes opened on his, now staring hard at her. "Forgotten what?"
"What we were talking about before." His hand moved to the front, but hovered just shy of touching her. "Like about what you're hiding and why you ..."
She nearly rolled her eyes. "Could you stop, already? You know the rules."
"Well, you just fucked me bareback, so there's one rule shot to hell. We've also fooled around at work and..."
"Fine." She rolled over and faced away. She ahd done those things. Let those things go. "But this is one rule that stays. We don't talk shop."
"Technically this isn't talking shop because it has nothing to do with work. I would have pointed that out earlier, but you stuck your tongue down my throat. This is about..."
"It doesn't matter. It's not part of this." She shook her head and sat up, still facing away from him. "Lex, do you think you're the only one this is confusing for? I can't do this if I think about our history. We're never going to agree on it. And I can't do this if I think about all the reasons I shouldn't. Because then I wouldn't and... I... I don't want to stop. I think I need this, as bad as it looks on paper. I... I need... this." She stopped short of sayinghim. She wasn't ready to say it. She was still having trouble thinking it, it was so new.
She laid down again, staring at the ceiling. "I don't want to think about the rest of it. It's too cluttered up with anger and other people and..." She turned her head to him. "I don't know. I just want something that's... only mine." His eyes turned thoughtful as her voice dropped to a whisper. "It's my biggest secret, really."
"Bigger than why you suddenly started treating me like the enemy three years ago? You could, at least, explain that."
She pursed her lips. "And here I was, trying to make things so pleasant, but you just can't stop scratching." She sat up. "Fine. You want to talk about the past? Let's do it."
He sat up as well. "I'm not trying to start a fight here, Chloe. But we were... close that summer." He stroked a hand over her breast. Was he going to try to seduce it out of her?
"We were." She gave him a small smile nd leaned into his touch. "I think it was the closest I ever felt to you."
"We were almost friends then."
She hummed in agreement as his palm skated over her nipple. Always so damned sneaky...
"So what changed?"
"Oh, I don't know, Lex," she said lazily. "Maybe it was the fact that I hardly saw you after that summer." Learning about Clark's secret had, to an extent, changed everything she saw, including Lex and the sort of sneaky way he sniffed around Clark in those days. But that wasn't all of it. She grasped his wrist and held it away from her. "I guess my purpose had been served, as far as you were concerned, and I could just dutifully fade into..."
He narrowed his eyes. "That's not how it was."
"That's exactly how it was." She pushed his hand back at him and rose to her knees. "I did what I did to help you out and I came back worse off. Being 'dead,' my father had lost a job it wasn't exactly easy to get after your father had him blacklisted. We were struggling just to keep afloat and... Where were you? You were just going on with your life, going to benefits and sleeping with brunettes and getting accused of murder, another thing I helped out with," she said, remembering how she investigated with Clark to try to clear his name. "Something Clark told me you actually thanked him for. It was like I... I stopped existing for you until day you dragged me to the caves. So don't act like ours was some beautiful friendship was that I threw away."
He stared up at her. "I never thought..."
"Of course you didn't. I was just some kid who you only noticed because I happened to be able to implicate your father in a murder and gain you control of his company. You didn't think I existed outside of that or whatever else it is you might want from me, be it information or research or whatever manipulative..." She huffed and pulled at the sheet, trying to wrap it around her. "See, this is exactly why I don't want to talk shop. It brings up every reason why I should not be doing this. You just had to go and ruin everything. I hope you're happy now. You..." She pulled harder at the sheet only to find his hand wrapped around the other end. "Let go."
"No."
"Fine." She let her end go and stepped off the bed. "Where's my damned dress?" she muttered, bending down. "I kicked it off..." Her words were cut off as the world kind of flipped. She found herself on the bed with him looming over her.
He was staring down at her. She waited for him to say whatever it was. But he said nothing, only leaned down, running his lips over hers, back and forth. She stayed still until he pulled back. She figured it was just his way of stopping her leaving and waited for whatever counter-argument he had waiting. But he just kept... looking at her until the silence made her squirm beneath him.
She swallowed hard. "Lex... What do you want from me? I can't give you things that aren't mine to give. I can't..."
He bent his head again.
*******************************
He fitted his lips to hers, first the bottom, then the top, noticing somewhere in there that he never really explored the texture of her lips. Tongues always got involved right off and, after that, things just devolved to a place where there was no time to notice minute details...
Like the jutting cupids bow that softened into her lightly lined top lip that had a sort of point at the bottom edge just before it disappeared into her mouth where all was softer snd wetter. And that slightly pouty bottom lip that had the slightest dip in the middle.
These weren't things he lingered over. These things took him into dangerous territory.
The problem was that he was already there. He'd known it when she'd appeared in his doorway. He knew that this had become about more than heated sex and private gloating that Chloe Sullivan was writhing underneath him. This had become... needed.
He couldn't kid himself that it was just a fun distraction anymore. He hadn't been with anyone but her since that first night. Hadn't even considered it, really.
That was never the plan.
Nothing with her went according to plan. Especially not tonight. He'd wanted to further question her about all the things he knew she was hiding. He didn't want to let everything go just to have her first.
That being shot to hell, he'd wanted to pick up where they left off. He didn't want to zero in on a line of questioning just to back off when she made him feel like an asshole for ignoring her all those years ago.
He wanted to think up a really good answer for that, not kiss her because she looked at him with big, melting eyes. He wanted a plan.
The problem was he wanted her to stay more. And not to fight. Not even to fuck. Just to stay.
He rolled to his side and pulled her with him. "Stay," he whispered, hating the near-pleading tone of his voice. "Just stay."
She stared back at him, then sat up.
He squeezed his eyes shut, waiting for the bed to settle as she rose. It didn't. He felt his covers against his shoulder. "I wonder what it would be like."
He opened his eyes to find her across from him, eyes half-closed, hand moving to his chest. "What?" He tried not to sound surprised, as if he knew she'd still be there.
"If we'd met some other way. If none of the other stuff had happened."
It wasn't something he'd ever wondered. "I don't think we would have met. We don't exactly move in the same circles."
"But we could have." Her eyes turned thoughtful. "Maybe just on the street. Would that make all this easier?"
"This meaning..." He'd nearly said us. He didn't want to say us. Saying words like that meant he was well and truly whipped, worse then with Lana, worse than with Helen or... He was starting to rethink his ideas that he was a strong, stalwart man.
"This. What we do here," she said, pursing her lips. "Do you know why I need rules?"
He smiled slightly. "To keep me from talking and ruining everything?" She'd accused him of that more than once.
She shook her head, then stilled. "Well... Maybe a little. It's just that... this needs to be separate. It needs to just be... this."
He tilted his head. "So... I'm just kind of a real doll for you?"
"No." She twirled a finger on his chest. "You are... what you are when we're like this. I'm not going to bed with that other guy. I'm going to bed with you. It's separate. Different. I am, too. We aren't who we are outside of this. We're just... Lex and Chloe. Just two people who enjoy each other and the rest of it just..." She shrugged. "It just doesn't matter here."
Doesn't matter? It should. It should matter more than anything. And maybe later, he'd be kicking himself for thinking it didn't. But at this moment, with her near him, all soft skin and still smelling of fading perfume and sex... Nothing else mattered.
"Just Lex and Chloe, huh?"
She nodded, her eyes dropping to his lips.
He moved his head to hers. "I can do that," he said against her mouth. He was a sick, sad man.
***********************
She woke to blinding sunlight and a hand shaking her.
She opened her eyes to find Lex standing by the bed, fully dressed. "Oh. You're up."
She shook herself and pulled herself to a sitting position. "Hard to sleep with someone shaking..."
He thrust a cup of coffee under her nose, some sloshing on the blankets. "Here."
"Here's your hat. What's your hurry?" she muttered.
"What?"
"Nothing." She took the cup, securing the sheet around her. She supposed he wanted her up and out quickly. "Give me a second and I'll..."
"I have a meeting," he said, his voice kind of rushed. He paced away from the bed to the door. "Some of my shareholders want to be assured I'm not dead with the rumours of my injury floating around and you can tell your cousin that there will be no story on the events in Detroit no matter how many people she annoys."
"No. I didn't think there would be." She nodded to herself and stood. Wasn't it nice having a boss who generated front page news that could never be printed? It definitely chipped away at the haze of last night. "Anyway, I should..."
"You should... stay." He paced back to the bed. "I just... If you're tired, you can sleep more. I'm not trying to kick you out or... anything." He moved to the door again. He finally stilled, thankfully, as she was getting a little dizzy watching him. "I put your car in the garage," he said, his back to her. "There's no staff here until Monday, so no one knows you're here."
She nodded. "Good."
"And nobody would know if you... stayed longer."
She stared at his back. "Uh..."
He moved back toward the bed again, his eyes not meeting hers. "I was thinking about what you said and wondered if maybe..." His eyes slid to hers. "Maybe the rest of it, everything out there, could have a longer break. Maybe... until Monday."
"I... I'm..." Tempted? "No. What would I tell people? I..."
"You're a grown woman, Chloe. You can go out of town for a weekend for some alone time." He shook his head. "In fact, you might want to say you've already done it. When I got your keys, I saw your cell phone had about twelve missed calls, equal parts Clark and Lois. They always keep such tabs?" He put his hand up. "Never mind. It's... it's not part of this."
He held her eyes and she found herself nodding. "I... I could be out of town."
She expected... She actually wasn't sure what she expected, but it wasn't this sudden tightening of his features, then a jerky nod. "Good." He moved to the door. "I shouldn't be gone long."
"What about clothes? I don't have..."
"Do you think you need them?" He turned to her in the open doorway. "Really?"
She opened her mouth, but nothing came out but a rather high-pitched squeak.
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CHAPTER FIFTEEN
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