Before Sunset (Part Thirty-Five)

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Part 35

Clark stood frozen, arms still wrapped around Chloe, as Lana pushed her way through the crowd, which seemed to be, one by one, turning to him and Chloe.

He'd said he'd do it. He'd teased Chloe that he'd kiss her in the middle of the Talon. But he hadn't imagined it like this. Not the kissing part, that was actually exactly what he needed at the end of this day. He'd just never really thought of Lana.

"Clark."

He turned slightly unfocused eyes to Chloe. He'd never thought she'd be the one to do the kissing, either, with her rules and restrictions and thirty day waiting periods. When he touched her shoulder, he thought she'd just drag him off to talk about Lex. They still needed to do that, actually.

"Lex was..."

"Not now," she said, pulling away, but keeping hold of his sleeve. "We need to find Lana now."

"Of course." He nodded dully. "Of course we do." Between this insane day, Chloe up and kissing him, and Lana, he needed to focus on just one thing. But why did it have to be the hardest one?

He let Chloe pull him through the increasingly curious crowd, heard their whispers even with the oblivious singer failing to hit that "Take On Me" high note. He ignored them and focused on the back of Chloe's head as they headed to the side exit, not sure if he wanted Lana to be there or long gone.

Of course, she was. By the time they spilled out into the alley, Lana was facing the opposite wall, taking visibly deep breaths.

"Lana," he started.

"I was gonna go," she said, her back still to them. "Then I remembered I live here. That and there's no one to keep an eye on things." He heard a watery sniff.

"Did you want me to call my mom to..."

"How long has this been going on?" She turned, then swiping at her eyes.

He glanced at Chloe, who seemed at a rare loss for words. He was also having trouble figuring out how to answer that. He took a deep breath. "Lana, things just got... complicated when we were away."

"So since you've been home..."

Chloe stepped forward. "But nothing has happened since we got back," she said hastily, gesturing to the door. "I didn't mean for that..."

"No." Lana trained a glare on Chloe. "I'm glad you've managed to control yourself this long."

"Don't put this on Chloe. She was the one who said we shouldn't... I mean... I wanted to be..." 

"No. I'm putting it together. You two decided to fool around in evacuation." She turned on Clark. "So... what? You're just crazy about Chloe now? And, of course, the only thing to do is hang around pitiful me and act like nothing happened, then come to my cafe and give the whole town a floor show. Much better than actually telling me the truth."

"I didn't want to hurt you," Clark tried softly.

"Oh, good job. Because this feels amazing."

Clark reached out a hand, but she jerked away. "Lana, I just... I wanted to be there for you. I know you went through so much. And I... I said we were going to be friends, you and me."

"But you didn't say why." Lana shook her head, eyes still spearing him. "Oh, you didn't lie, Clark. You just... left something out. Like you always do. I've felt that for years." 

Chloe sighed and stepped toward her. "Lana, we weren't even sure this was going anywhere. We just wanted to help you after all you went through and..."

"Wow. Thanks for the charity." She moved to the door.

"It wasn't like that." Clark stepped in front of her. "We didn't think you hanging around Lex was good for you."

"It's cute how it's 'we' now." She breathed out a bitter laugh. "Of course, it always kind of was. You'd think, after four years of your secret projects and knowing looks..."

"Lana..."

"No. I see it now." She pushed past Clark and jerked the door open before turning back. "And thanks for deciding who I should and shouldn't hang around, but I think I'd trust Lex before either of you." 

Clark stared at the slammed door, then at Chloe who, for her part, was staring at a dead mouse. He suddenly realized it smelled terrible here and wasn't sure how much was him and how much was owed to the dumpsters against either wall. 

"I should get you back to your truck," Chloe said softly, her eyes still trained on the ground as she moved stiffly out into the street.

"Yes. I need to go home and... shower and all that." He kept his eyes off her as they walked in silence to her car. It was saddening how all felt right with the world when she kissed him and now even looking at her felt like a punishable offense. They kept their silence on the way to her house. It wasn't until he opened the door that Chloe broke it.

"We need to talk, you know." 

He supposed they did. And he knew what she'd say. "Later," he said softly. "We'll talk later."

**************

It was past midnight by now and he still couldn't sleep. He'd spent most of these hours internally practicing speeches to Chloe, to be delivered with heaps of maturity tomorrow, for after she dropped her axe. Then he'd crept from his room and into the barn, hoping the more open air would give some kind of relief from the heat, but he still felt stifled and edgy -- also damned hot. It was something that was really getting to him now that summer had started up in earnest. He'd never been bothered by heat before. Even without powers, after his first real brush with cold in the Arctic, he'd welcomed it. Maybe it wouldn't bother him so much now if everything else wasn't closing in. 

Lana was obviously the thing weighing on him most. He supposed he thought Lana might just grow to feel as he did. That she'd step back and see that they had never made it work, that they never would. Then there was Chloe. Chloe who, if anything could work... Well, it was her. But maybe that's all they were. Just work. Just some well-oiled machine that solved the mysteries, found the hidden pieces, saved the occasional day. It seemed so cold and lifeless, the idea that a working relationship was all they could have when he knew there could be so much more to them. But, as much as that kiss was everything he needed just now, Lana showing up had effectively thrown a cold bucket of guilt all over it. She'd said they "needed to talk," after all. He suspected that, tomorrow, that thirty days would be getting some kind of extension with what happened tonight. But he couldn't help feeling that the more they put this off, this unknowable amazing thing they might be together, the more putting it off would become just another thing they made work. Chloe had, by her own admission, made some sort of study of putting the idea of him away. Is that something he would have to learn to do? Maybe. Maybe it was the right thing to do right now.

And as much as he'd thrown Lex off for now, Lex had made it rather clear that his interest in Clark was still there. And that had never felt threatening in years past, even with all he'd had to hide then. It did now that Lex was shaping to fill the gaps left by Lionel's descent into catatonia. Maybe it wasn't so much fear for himself, but for the world out there and what he knew he would have to do, even powerless as he was now. He just had to hope that what he'd taken from that ship made some kind of difference. Chloe had made it clear, in an off-hand way, that she hid it like he asked, though he didn't know where. It didn't matter if he did know as leaving the farm right now wasn't an option with...

"Is this later?"

He sat up with what he hoped was not a girlish gasp at her voice. "Chloe?"

He heard a slight click and covered his eyes at the beam of her flashlight as she moved further into the loft. "You said we'd talk later."

"I was thinking when the sun was out," he said, moving to his desk. He flicked on the lamp.

"And I was thinking this couldn't wait." She turned off her flashlight.

He had to wonder why. All she was going to do was talk about more waiting. If anything could wait, it was that.

She paced toward the couch. "You said Lex doesn't know we know. But how do we know he doesn't know we know?"

He stared at her, taken aback not only by her horribly confusing question, but the fact that she was talking about Lex. He'd thought for sure she'd want to talk about Lana and what that meant for them... or the nonexistance of them.

"As far as Lex knows, I didn't make it past the perimeter. And you weren't even there," he finished. "What about the crystal and the key?"

"Oh. The disc and that..." She shuddered slightly. "I buried it and that... thing near the Cat In the Hat tree."

"The what?"

She rolled her eyes and perched on the arm of his couch. "The Wizard tree."

"Oh, cool." The Wizard tree was probably the coolest possible place to hide something, even if Chloe and Pete had other stupid names for it. "But please say you didn't tell my parents about..."

"Clark, I have been sneaking since second grade. I know what to share with parental units and what to not."

"Good."

"I figure we can dig them up first thing tomorrow and figure out..."

"Not tomorrow." He sighed and sat on his desk.

"But we need to figure out what to do with them."

"I think the best thing to do is keep them hidden for now. Lex might still be watching me. He almost said so." But just almost, as it always was with Lex. Hard to stop. That's what he actually said. But it was best not to take chances just yet. "Anyway, I'm grounded till the weekend." 

"Grounded?" Chloe scoffed. "But you're eighteen."

"And still living under my parents' roof, as they both reminded me over and over. So..."

"Grounded." She nodded. "I've heard that sucks."

"Huh." Come to think of it... "You've never actually been..."

"Hardly." Chloe smiled. "I'm a girl with a working single father who dotes on her. I've learned to talk my way out of punishments. We'll find a way around it."

He supposed she could. Chloe had talked her way out of and into a lot of things -- secure facilities, motels, relationships... 

Maybe now was the time to address that gigantic elephant in the barn. He stood. "Listen, I'm an ass*hole."

She let out a slight laugh. "What?"

"I'm sorry I said you were punishing me before. I feel like I've been taunting you and pressuring you. And you've been right all along. I get it now. Really."

She stood up. "What do you get?"

"Your month. I mean, it's probably not a good idea to get mixed up with me right now. I'm this... useless mess."

"Clark..." She moved to him, shaking her head. "Look at all you did today."

"I further screwed things up with Lex..."

"To protect me."

She was really close now. "I... I couldn't even break up with Lana without hurting her."

"Clark, it was never not going to hurt, losing you. Trust me on that." She placed her hand on his chest. He suddenly realized he was standing only inches from her and only in his boxers. And she wasn't wearing much more, with her shorts and her flimsy little tank top.

Though parts of him were getting hopeful and that hand smack against his bare skin wasn't helping, he'd been practicing variations of this speech. He was trying to be really, really mature, here. "I just... If you want to wait longer, I get it."

She lifted her eyes to his and her hand slid to his shoulder. "Why would I want to wait longer?"

I have no idea. He swallowed hard. "Because we're... having... this transition thing and... dealing with stuff." He swore that he had a better version of this tucked in his head somewhere, but that was a version where she wasn't touching him. And now her hand was on the back of his neck and pulling and... "What about those fourteen days left?"

"I don't need them," she whispered, close to his lips.

Really close to his lips. He'd bent to her, folded his arms around her. When had that happened? "It's just... Maybe it's too messy right now," he tried. Just one last ditch try at maturity. Just one last effort before he let himself have what he wanted -- her, by the way. "Maybe it's not the right time."

"Clark, I don't want to wait for some far-off right time. I've waited for you long enough. Lana's never going to not hurt... and that's just not about you. Lex is never going to stop breathing down your neck. And there will always, just always, be some kind of peril." She slipped just slightly out of his arms, just enough to pull off her tank. "So why can't we be just a little happy together, I mean, even with all that going on?"

The fact that she wasn't even wearing a bra made her argument all the more convincing. But still... "You were actually the one that said..."

"Forget what I said."

"I will. But you have to admit that you were the one who was putting everything..."

She met his lips, then. for the second time today. And it was much better when it could go on... and on... and on. He almost wanted to stop, get her to eat just the tiniest bit of crow now that he'd decided being mature was overrated. Maybe later. Right now, all he wanted was to be as close as possible. These last weeks were nothing new. He and Chloe had often gone weeks only seeing each other here and there, weeks without touching, weeks tense and barely glancing at each other. But that was before and he damned well would never go back to that again. Not now.

And that wasn't just about sex... or not all of it was. It was just that now he knew Chloe now in ways he never had before... also not all about sex. He knew that she waited patiently for him to tell her what he was -- or had been -- even after she knew. He knew she protected him as best she could. He knew her reaction to the truth about him amounted to calling him a superhero. He knew that, had he really known Chloe all along, he'd never have been afraid of her. He sometimes wondered if all that confusion over how to feel about Chloe since the day he met her all stemmed from that fear of her, of her drive to yank the truth into the light wherever she could. It was similar to the fear of Lex. Clever people like them couldn't be let too close. 

But now he couldn't have her close enough. He could barely let her away enough to pull him to the couch. Now he knew her. And there would be no going back. No tense, confused friendship full of loaded conversations where they walk away frustrated and incapable of saying what they mean. He did draw back then, gasping for breath, trying to catch her eyes. "There's no going back now, Chloe." 

Her eyes opened slowly, then met his squarely. "I know."

********************************

"I know, Clark," she repeated, keeping her gaze steady on his.

She did know. She knew the moment she kissed him in the Talon. When a girl lays one on a foul-smelling guy in front of all and sundry, including his ex-girlfriend, it doesn't leave much room for take-backs. Maybe that had been why she'd done it. At the time, she hadn't many thoughts beyond "Clark. Mine." So why didn't she drag him off somewhere away from the younger half of the town? Why right there and then when, once again, Clark stank to high heaven? Why in a cafe owned by Lana where it was fairly likely Lana would be? Because he was hers. And maybe she was sick of pretending he wasn't. She was sick of guarding herself and resigning herself, sick of worrying about who was hurt when everything in her was screaming that this man belonged to her. All mine now. Everyone knows it. She felt a grin creeping up and moved to kiss him again.

But he took her by the waist, held her away, looking all too serious. "If you wake up tomorrow and try to roll over and give me some speech about our friendship or tell me this means less than... everything..."

"What makes you think I'd do a thing like that?" She smiled and hoped he would, too.

No such luck. His eyes clouded over, his lips drawing into a sort of pout. "You know you would. So promise you won't." 

She slipped out of his hands and moved around him. "I promise I won't wake up here," she said with rather slow thoughtfulness. 

He turned to follow her."Chloe..."

"I don't think grounded men are allowed the have naked sleepovers, anyway."

"I'm serious."

"I know you are. And I know you probably want some sort of serious relationship mission statement." She pressed her hands to his chest. "But I just don't have in me to be serious at the moment." She pressed harder and he fell lightly to the couch, gripping her wrist, looking torn between pulling her to him and holding her off. "Clark, every time we did this, I was half-miserable, trying to prepare myself to let you go again. And tonight..." She lowered herself to his lap. "I just love not feeling that way."

Clark's eyes widened. "That's how you felt the whole time?"

She sighed. "I just meant that tonight, it's different and..."

"No. I'm really glad I'm not making you miserable for a change," he huffed.

She couldn't decide if he was annoying or hot or utterly adorable. She supposed if anyone could make all three work for him at once, it was Clark. "You're just not going to make this easy for me, are you?"

"Well, you didn't exactly make it easy all this time."

"I know I didn't."

"You say you know, but I feel like you don't really know. I mean... I've been going crazy. I've been unable to even..." He gestured downward. "Even that because you keep popping into my head and I don't know if I was allowed to even fantasize about you!"

Her eyes widened. "Of course you can..." She let out a nervous laugh. "I mean, I... I've always figured masturbatory fantasy was well within... um... acceptable boundaries. I mean, as far as you, I've always..."

"No, don't tell me. Or do. Just... not right this second." He closed his eyes, looking like he was in deep pain. She supposed he was. Poor guy.

"Don't worry." She kissed his jaw. "I didn't forget." She braced her hands on his thighs and slid to the floor. "I owe you."

His eyes opened wide. "What are you doing?"

"Even-ing things up," she said, giving him what she hoped was her coyest glance as she pulled at his waistband.

"That's not fair," he said on a slight gasp. But he lifted his hips, anyway, as she slid his boxers off.

"I'm pretty much kneeling at your feet, here." She pressed a kiss to the inside of his thigh. "What more do you want?"

"I don't know," he groaned. "I can't think. I just... just want... things... to know..." His verbal skills seemed to deterioarate as she slid her lips further up. Good. "Wait. Stop!"

She did, standing with a grunt. "Clark, can't we talk after..."

He grasped her wrist and tugged her down, rolling over her. "Just tell me this is it. You and me."

She let out a confused laugh. "I thought that was obvious. I've only wanted you since we met. You've been the hold-out."

"Well... yeah. But not since..."

"Clark," she groaned, gripping his neck and pulling him down for one very frustrated, impatient kiss before she pushed him away and slid from under him to sit up. "It's you and me from here on out. No more confusion, no more hiding, no more waiting." She pushed her own shorts roughly and kicked them away. "There!"

"All I needed to know." He had the nerve to smile. "So are we finally going to have sex now?"

She pushed at him with an annoyed grunt, but he refused to budge. "Big, stupid..."

He grinned and caught her wrists, lowering himself over her. "I really missed you," he sighed, not so much looking deep in her eyes as her breasts.

"You talking to me or them?"

"Mostly them." He glanced up at her, letting her wrists go to cup each one. "You, I got to see plenty." She'd be a lot more annoyed if he wasn't pressing soft kisses between her breasts. "You need to stop wearing shirts," he whispered against her nipple. "Or just bras."

"That would get me arrested," she said on a sigh. "You, on the other hand, can walk around topless all you want."

"Why are the laws so sexist?"

"It's fine by me," she said, giggling just a little as that bit of stubble on his chin brushed at her ribs. She took his face in her hands, holding him still. "I missed all your assorted parts, by the way. Mind letting me finish making things even?"

"I mind." He slid a hand down to her hip, settling more firmly over her. "We don't exactly have all night." He lowered his lips to her neck. "I'm going to have to kick you out before my Dad comes in for the cows."

"Ah, yes. Grounded." She let out a breath of a laugh as he inhaled deeply. 

"Don't gloat. My dad's seriously thinking of telling your dad on you. Except he probably won't." 

"Could we not talk about our dads?"

"Good idea." He lifted his head. "I wish you could sleep here. Been so hard to sleep without you." He bent his head to her neck again and she held him there, knowing the feeling. She had gotten accustomed to his heat at her back, the weight of his leg thrown over her hip, even his light snores stirring her hair. Sometimes, in her own bed, she'd reach behind her, almost panicked that he wasn't there. It was a bit like those rude awakenings on their journey, except she was safe and home and not facing frostbite. And there was relief, but also a hollow feeling. He wasn't there and she'd have to spend the next hour, tossing and uncomfortable, and wondering if he'd be there ever again, if she could let him be. 

But he was there now and even in those times he wasn't, she could sleep easier knowing that he would be. Maybe it would take months or even a year, but they would figure out a way. As for now, she'd be happy with what she could get. A stolen hour here and there. She was determined to steal as many hours as she could before college and... That hollow feeling gnawed at her again. 

She pushed it away as his hand slid between their bodies, fingers searching over the place where she was already damp for him. A moment ago, she might have wanted him inside her already, but she kind of needed his touch right now, to chase that feeling away and help her enjoy what they could have now. It wasn't enough as she was sure she could never get enough of him. But damned if it didn't come close.

She gasped as he found her clit, slightly rough before he gentled his movements.

"Sorry. Got carried away."

"It's good," she breathed. "It's good," she repeated, tossing her head back and groping behind her for the couch pillow as his fingers moved in quicker circles.

"Like riding a bike," he said, sounding almost self-satisfied enough to ruin it... almost. He had gotten pretty well acquainted with her clitoris in their time away, but he didn't have to be so smug about it. She started to tell him so, but then he shifted downward, lips burning a heated trail down from her belly button and she really didn't want to interrupt by then.

She vaguely recalled that she was supposed to be the one with the head between his legs, but couldn't find it in her to protest when his tongue replaced his fingers. She felt his hand, slightly damp, grope its way blindly upward, a little confused when it passed her breasts. 

"Chloe. Shhh."

She looked down. "Why'd you stop?"

"They'll hear you." 

She hadn't even realized she was making a sound. It wasn't something they'd really had to worry about before. She used what wits were about her to pull that pillow she was squeezing to death down, right over her face, dimly registering his chuckle before she used the other hand to grip him by the hair and get him back to work. Selfish? Maybe a little. But he started it and he better finish it.

The pillow had that old, damp smell. Really, the whole couch did. And it was in a barn which, though she'd gotten used to it over the years, smelled about like you'd expect a barn to. But they'd been in worse places. Once again, the fact that she was with Clark was the magic touch that made it all work. She moaned into the pillow, now painfully aware of her voice, but trying not to be so she could feel those heated tingles grow. She swore they were creeping out to her limbs now, making the skin along her arms and legs crackle with awareness. She could feel everything at once, good or bad -- the slightly roughened flat of his tongue moving up down, a hardened stain just under her palm on the couch pillow from some long-ago spill, his hand reflexively gripping her breast at each sound she made, the snuffling sound of a horse just below, that occasional mild scrape of his teeth that made her hips jerk upward.

She dimly recalled that had been a problem the first time he'd tried this and she tried her damnedest to keep still. But it was getting impossible to stay still, keep it down, forget about the horses, remember the parents... all too much! Clark seemed more on top of things as she felt both hands slide down, clamping down on either side of her hips. Lucky he did, as soon all she could feel was his mouth and those vibrations spreading outward, the clenching in her legs and arms, the tension and tightening of everything before...

"Mmmmmmfffffff!"

It was sort of a scary noise. And as her body melted into the couch, she was kind of glad for that pillow. She shuddered to think what she might have sounded like without it. She pulled it away, cringing even as the rest of her was a limp puddle of flesh. 

She let out a breathy laugh. "So... I'm still ahead."

"I'm okay with that," she heard. 

She laughed again. "You would be. I just bet you'll use this to..." She trailed off when she looked down at him, half-kneeling between her legs, naked, tensed, and damp. She felt her insides clench and tense again, but also this wave of emotion as she sat up just to touch his face, grip his neck, pull him down to her. Because he wanted her, maybe even as much as she wanted him. He'd ached for her, maybe as much as she did for him. And he'd waited for her. She wasn't going to let him wait another second. 

She looked down between them, sliding her hand down his chest, gripping him as he moaned, hardening even more in her hand. 

"Chloe, it's been so..."

"I know." She shifted under him, opening her legs wider. She kept her eyes on his as she guided him inside, sliding her hand around and up his back when he took over, pushing in those last inches with a breathy moan that was almost cute. The look in his eyes was less so, rather intensely boring into hers as he started moving. She could tell that a part of him was still resentful, still half-angry that she'd made him wait. She couldn't take it back. But she could tell him... "Never again, Clark," she whispered as she hooked a leg over his hip, trying to draw him in deeper. "I promise." She craned her neck upward to meet his lips and he moaned, sinking into her over and over as his lips grazed hers. She could taste herself on him and it was strange, but not enough to stop her kissing him.

She could tell he was close already, what with these weeks without even his hand to take it away. She could tell he was trying to hold out, though, his movements growing jerky and his face strained. "Let go," she whispered, sliding her hand up his slickened back. "I want you to." 

"Want you to," he grunted. It was just another one of those reasons to love Clark Kent. He was a giver. But she wasn't going to come again, or at least not soon enough. Besides, she wanted to see him, wanted to see every emotion on his face, feel every shudder without retreating into her own body. 

"I want to see you, Clark." She pressed upward, tightened her legs around him. "Please," she brushed his lips, "let me see you."

His eyes looked conflicted before they closed. "Chloe, don't..."

But she did. She tightened her inner muscles around him, moved under him as best she could on the fairly narrow couch, took in every sight, sound, and feeling -- his one leg braced on the floor, his hands digging into the cushions on either side of her, his mouth growing slack and panting, the damp skin under hear hands. She supposed she could come again if she really wanted to. But, somehow, this felt like enough. She moved and clenched until his movements faltered and his head dropped to her shoulder with one last push and a soft growl of her name. 

She breathed deep, content to have his weight on her. "There. Not so ahead."

"Cheater," he mumbled into her skin, biting lightly.

She let out a slight laugh. "Well, this night had to end some time."

"No, it didn't." He lifted his head with a grunt. "Don't worry. You'll get yours, Chloe Sullivan."

"I guess I will." She pressed a kiss to his chin. "If we can figure out how to get around your parents."

He groaned loudly and dropped his head again. "You would do this just when I'm grounded."

"I know. I'm cruel like that. Now let me up." She shook herself and pushed at him. "Before I fall asleep."

He let out a slight whine and flattened himself on her. 

"Clark..."

"I know, I know." He braced his arms on either side of her and pushed, wincing just a little as he pulled out of her, then stood.

"You'll get grounded for the rest of your adult life if they find me here." She sat up. "Where's my top?"

"Here." She turned to find him holding it out while trying to pull up his boxers with one hand. She giggled and moved to take it, sort of wishing they had more time to sit around so she could just... look at him. Another day, maybe.

"You know this isn't going to be easy," he said, sitting on his desk as she pulled on her shorts. 

"I know." She frowned as she toed her sandal over. "I doubt they'll let you go off looking for our buried treasure."

"Oh, yeah. That, too."

She tossed him a smile as she slipped into her other sandal, then shuffled over to him. "I think we'll find a way. Might even be fun, added challenges and all. I've kind of got a thing for intrigue."

"I noticed." He pulled her in, burying his face in her neck. "You know, sometimes my dad sleeps in and..."

"Okay. Let me go."

"Fine. Get outta here," he grunted, pushing her slightly.

She grinned, then groped behind him, coming up with his phone. She quickly lifted her top and snapped a picture before tossing it back to him. "With my blessings," she said, glancing down at his boxers.

He looked torn between a smile and a gasp of outrage. "Oh, now you better run."

She laughed as she hurried down the steps.

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