Almost Chloe (Chapter Twenty-Nine)

Chapter 29

Chloe pulled at her seatbelt yet again, never quite secure that it was fastened.

If she was going to die, at least she wasn't dying a coward. It had taken bravery beyond imagining to climb into the Bell with Linda.

"Ollie, you weren't home," Linda was yelling into her cell. "What was I supposed to do? We had a love-related emergency and... Tell Victor to shut up. I won't hurt the love of his life. The Bell's doing fine. I'm doing fine. And Chloe's not complaining." She turned to Chloe and the copter jerked with her. "Are you?"

Chloe gave her a weak smile and pointed in front of her. "Please look where you're going?"

"No... She said she was happy we're going... That's it. I'm hanging up. I'll call when I land... In like ten minutes... I'm hanging up." She tossed the phone to Chloe, barking "Turn it off." Chloe obeyed. Anything to keep this chopper in the air and not in a heap with them under it.

"This is so that scene in a movie. Like a Meg Ryan or Sandra Bullock type where the girl has to go get the guy and all." She patted Chloe's knee. "You're kind of a Meg. It's the scrappiness. Our family's nothing if not scrappy... Anyway, this is that scene." She frowned. "Does that make me the slutty or fat or nerdy friend?" She shook her head and the Bell shook with it. "No... I'm like the married friend. Or I will be. I mean, come on!"

Chloe wanted to leap out and kiss the ground when they landed, but she had to save some of that for Clark.

Linda leaned back in her seat, her lips pursed. "A little farther than I wanted to be. We're about a quarter mile away." She turned to the controls. "I'll go back up."

"NO!" Chloe took a deep breath. "I need a little walk... to clear my head."

Linda nodded. "Go on. Go get your idiot." She grabbed the phone from Chloe's hand. "I'll go check in with mine."

The blades were slowing, but they whipped her hair around her face. She was near frozen. In all the fuss, she was only wearing sweatpants with a tank top and sneakers. She looked back at the warm Bell and wondered if she should risk Linda moving her closer.

She decided against it and ran. Linda was right. This was the scene in the movie where the girl rushed through crowded streets or, in her case, corn fields. Maybe it was more of an X-files romantic comedy. At any rate, this was the scene where she decided not to give up, decided that the man she loved had to know. This was the scene that ended with a kiss before the credits, when a snappy Motown song took over from the swelling violins.

She'd never been in this scene. Every moment they had that neared romantic was tainted by the grime of lust or the tang of danger. This time, no one was an danger and there were no red rocks. She'd nearly had this scene in Maine. This time, she'd get it.

She was sweating even in the cold air when the Kent house was in sight. She slowed as she approached it. There was a light in the kitchen. This had happened before. She'd come through this same field looking for Clark and finding Martha alone. She approached quietly, her eyes hungry for shapes as the kitchen window opened up to her. They were there- both of them.

She watched silently as Martha pulled herself out of her son's arms and brought a tissue to her nose. She couldn't hear what they said, but Clark was speaking. Martha nodded and wiped her nose. She watched him walk away and saw Martha sink to the kitchen table, her head falling into her hands. She knew what this scene was.

This was the last possible minute.

She stood frozen as he exited the house, moving towards the barn. She let out a steamy breath. He stopped suddenly, his shoulders tense. But he didn't turn. He walked on. He knew she was there. She could feel it. She also knew he was hoping she'd go away.

"Not a chance," she whispered, moving toward the barn.

The barn seemed almost foreign to her now. So much had happened since the summer.

She climbed the steps, shivering from the cold. When she reached the top, he was leaning over the couch, stuffing a shirt into a bag. "Bringing a change of clothes this time?"

He didn't turn. "Mom packed food, too. It's probably enough for months."

"Well, most of it will be frozen, so..." She hugged her arms and leaned on the railing. "How long?"

He straightened, but kept his back to her. "I don't know. I can't delay leaving any longer. There's no excuse."

She nearly kept her thoughts to herself, but decided to voice them instead. "Aren't I an excuse?" She saw his hand run through his hair. Her gaze followed it hungrily. "Couldn't you take some time to talk to me?"

"What do you want to talk about?"

She let out a gasp. "How about how you ran away from me again?" Her voice began to crack. "How about how, the minute things get too close to the truth between us, you're off? How about how, despite all this, I've always been yours for the asking?"

"You shouldn't be."

"It doesn't change the fact that I am."

"The things you want from me..." He finally turned, his eyes soft on her beneath the glasses. "I can't give them to you. I can't promise you anything. I don't know what's going to happen. I... I can't be with you."

"How do you know?"

"I just know."

She let out a tiny sob. "That's ironic. Because I have pushed you. I have always pushed you to be more than a simple guy that lives on a farm. I always knew you could be so much more." She took a shaky breath. "And I guess you're finally listening. Of course, the direct result is you telling me you can't be with me." She stared across the room, her eyes pleading. "I always thought we'd save the world together, Clark."

"Chloe..." He shook his head and picked up the bag. He walked away toward the wide, empty window of the loft.

This was the scene where he suddenly dropped the bag and came back, told her they would be together soon, told her she was the only one.

The heroine would always cry as she was kissed here. Chloe braced herself for that kiss. She was already crying. She was halfway there. The credits could roll with a tender ballad and the hope of reunion.

But he didn't drop the bag and she panicked. "Clark, I love you. I've always loved you. I'll never stop."

He turned again, still holding the bag. She wished he'd drop it. This scene never happened with too many props. "I can't give you what you need. I'm sorry."

She swallowed hard, but managed to keep her eyes from squeezing shut in agony. "Okay. But you should know that I'll wait for you. I'll wait forever."

He closed his eyes and shook his head, then he came toward her, taking a jacket that was lying on the couch. He settled it about her shoulders and looked at her with something that was so like the piteous ones he'd given her all these years when he rejected her for Lana. This time, she did close her eyes. "Don't," was all he said.

When she opened her eyes, he was gone.

This wasn't how the movie ended. Even if they couldn't be together, couldn't he say he'd always love her? Couldn't he say he loved her at all? Was this really how it ended?

She supposed, when it was her life, this was how it ended.

She stumbled from the barn and past the Kent house. She couldn't even face Martha right now. She shivered as she ran again through the fields.

At the copter, Linda stepped out. "What did he say? Did you..." But one look at Chloe's face and she stopped her questions. She bundled the coat more firmly around Chloe and helped her in.

Linda flew carefully on the way back, no longer distracted by excitement and thoughts of romantic comedy. This wasn't that movie. This wasn't a movie she'd watch again.

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"Are you sure about this?"

She glanced at her cousin, then squeezed her eyes shut and nodded. "Do it before I change my mind."

"But your pretty hair..."

"Linda," she said deliberately. "We need to. I can't keep running around, the mirror image of a dead girl."

"But no one knows that dead girl here, Chl..."

"We don't say that name," she cut in. "Just do it. New lives need... new hair."

Linda snapped on her rubber gloves ominously. "Okay. Silky Sable, here we come..."

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Live as one of them, Kal-El, to discover where your strength and your power are needed. Always hold in your heart the pride of your special heritage. They can be a great people, Kal-El, they wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all, their capacity for good, I have sent them you... my only son.

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"My name is Lois Lane," she repeated to herself before bed, over and over, the night before her interview at The Star Sentinel. "My name is Lois Lane..."


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Continued in... Almost Lois